Little Monsters’ Mommies!

Apologies in advance to those of you who aren’t as sports-obsessed as mimi, but this morning’s paper contained an interesting story that dovetails so nicely with my rant on monster children, I just had to comment.

Apparently Josh Portis, the backup quarterback for the Florida Gators, will be transferring to another school after the Gators play in this year’s Outback Bowl. Why? Because mom wants him to.

Mom, you see, has been orchestrating Josh’s football career for years. When he wasn’t getting what she viewed as the proper level of respect at Redondo Union High School in California, she transferred him to Long Beach Poly, a well-known football power. When it became clear that Josh wasn’t going to be handed the starter job over a couple of seniors during his junior year, she transferred him to Taft High. Josh became a starter and was offered a scholarship at Utah, which became a scholarship to Florida when Coach Urban Meyer took over the reins at the Swamp.

This year, Josh is #2–as a true freshman, mind you–behind junior Chris Leak, who’s talented enough to have been on the Heisman watch his first two years at UF. Apparently, that’s not enough for mom. #2 in a blue-chip football program as a sophomore is just not enough respect for Patricia Portis’s baby, so Josh will be transferring.

At this point, someone has to wonder what’s in it for Patricia. Is she really looking out for Josh, or is she orchestrating what she thinks will be a mansion and a sweet, expensive ride once Josh makes it to the NFL? (Assuming, of course, his clock isn’t cleaned and he’s not permanently injured during his remaining three years of eligibility.) Are her machinations for her baby, or for herself?

Either way, that’s a scary prospect. I’m a supportive mom and know I have the two best kids on the planet. But so do most of my friends with kids. It’s a mother’s job to be mama bear, to swat dangerous things out of your babies’ paths and teach them how to survive in the big, bad forest of life. But I wonder whether Josh Portis and kids like him (aka, the little monsters who run wild in restaurants until the Big, Bad Owner asks them to behave like civilized creatures) will ever learn those survival skills if mom keeps moving them to a different part of the forest every time they comes up against a challenge?

If Josh Portis is as good as mom claims, there’s no reason why Josh can’t earn his place himself. Chris Leak, good as he is, hasn’t adjusted quickly to his new coach’s offensive style. Josh could have become the starter on his own merits, but how can that happen with mom swooping in (and showing up at least once a week at practice, and hanging around the athletic complex where Josh lives). Most tellingly, when asked about her role in his transfer choice, she hung up.

Mom, back off. Give the kid room to grow–and get knocked on his ass by a defensive lineman. More importantly, are you as forceful and concerned about his coursework at Florida? Do you expect him to earn his degree, or do you (and this is a scary thought) view him solely as a professional football playing-gravy train who’s going to “get his regardless,” as I’ve heard some parents say? Assuming your kid does make it to the NFL, do you think a pro coach is going to go along with your demands? Josh’s lockermates will probably wonder what kind of punk lets his mama make all his choices for him–not a good situation for a rookie to be in.

And that goes for you moms who scream at Little League/soccer/Pee Wee coaches, teachers, choir/drama directors, ballet masters, and principals when Baby Darling doesn’t get the starter/A/star position. Sometimes, baby’s gotta be a benchwarmer. A “C” student. In the chorus. How else is baby going to learn to be big?