The Little Monsters!

I have to admit feeling vindicated when reading about Dan McCauley, the proprietor of the Chicago-area bakery/sandwich shop A Taste of Heaven. Irritated to the limit by screeching wild creatures disguised as children that regularly invaded his shop, he posted a sign on the door of his shop reading, “Children of all ages have to behave and use their inside voices when coming to A Taste of Heaven.” (Read more here)

Amen, Brother Dan, Amen. This isn’t, as some outraged parents in his neighborhood allege, a childless vs. children problem. This is, essentially, a lack of courtesy problem, and one that’s gone too far for too long.

I have two children. They are no angels. They don’t listen, they think burping and farting are funny, they say embarrassing things. We’ve shared plenty of family dinners where I have had to say, in a voice slightly less loud than a tornado evacuation siren, “This is not the Wilderness, and I am not Moses. Sit your BUTTS down and DON’T MOVE.” And they sit. Their wandering is usually confined to our table (“But I want to hug Mama!” my daughter will say) and doesn’t happen every time we eat out. Usually, they sit, pay attention, say please and thank you to the server, and eat what’s put in front of them. Are they unusual? Apparently so, if you eat out often.

I loathe rude people. Rude, loud, look-at-me people who think the world should cater to their needs. What’s worse is the rude people who spawn. They may be rude, but their kids are worse. These are the kids who run full-tilt into servers carrying trays, who scream and throw tantrums, who have no manners. Worse yet, their parents hold conversations with the adults at their table, completely ignoring the havoc their little monsters are wreaking all around them. Godzilla Jr. can be pulling a destroy-Tokyo maneuver on someone else’s table, but Mommy can’t be disturbed from her latte to do anything about it.

I’m totally on Dan McCauley’s side. From what I understand, several of these Mommies (he called them “former cheerleaders and beauty queens” who “have a very strong sense of entitlement,” which isn’t far from the truth) are OUTRAGED and boycotting his shop. Joke’s on them. His business has tripled since news of the “behave/inside voices” sign hit the door. Good for him. If I lived in the Windy City, I’d become a regular customer.